When we think of pregnancy, the focus tends to be on the mom and baby, but there is a third person involved! Daddy pops, we have the guide for you. Little Steps asked new dads all over Hong Kong to give us their top tips for expecting dads. Check out what they have to say!
"Doctor's appointments are important. They are some of the first events you will experience as a family of three, or more. These visits are opportunities to bond with the baby as she or he grows, and to support your wife as her whole world begins to change. - Andrew Foster
"For prenatal visits, be sure you pay attention so you can stay fully up to speed with what’s going on. Post birth, pediatrician visits can definitely feel a bit chaotic particularly early on, as you’ll be trying to absorb tons of information from the doctor while keeping the little one calm." - Kevin Crowe
"Always go – you don’t want your lady to be the only mama sitting alone in the waiting room. The wait can also be longer than expected – most offices have WiFi – schedule appointments for Monday morning, so you can follow the NFL Sunday night game while patiently waiting." - Robert Ettinger
"Be ready to wait! Chances of the doctor actually seeing you at the exact time that you've scheduled your appointment is pretty low. Also, while moms get photos of the scans, we also took videos of the screen during the scans with our phones, which was cool to look at after." - Rahul Kotwal
"Ideally you have a doctor near your office so you can participate, particularly when the kid is fresh off the rack and you're trying to learn as you go." - Matt Bennett
"Have the 'Introducing Baby' email (and recipient list) drafted prior to the hospital visit. Depending on when baby decides to come, you will probably be in a sleep deprived and emotional state (not to mention your wife!), so you will be very happy you won't need to think through everyone who "should" be on the email." - T.W
"Let the Doctor do the talking. You're just there for moral support. Make sure your wife knows how proud you are of her afterwards!" - Robert Ettinger
"Get the go-bag ready a lot earlier than you think you need it. Include some snacks, games, or playing cards as you may be waiting a while. Also include all of the wife's favorite foods that she has been craving while pregnant. On the day you get to the hospital, try to go earlier, as there are still forms that you'll need to fill out. Don't forget your camera or video camera. We had set up a whatsapp group with family where we shared the bump photos and scans etc. We also ended up using it during the delivery to provide photos and updates for family overseas. It made everyone feel like they were more a part of it, and they got photos hot off the press! We still use the group to send photos and videos of the baby to family, and there is a nice record of how he has grown up right from when he was a bump! Lots of people will want to come visit. Play it by ear and go with the wife's "suggestion." - Rahul Kotwal
"Not everybody is cut out to cut the cord or watch the baby be pulled out. Know your limits so you're still standing the second the lil guy or gal joins you and your wife. Plus, fainting when you aren't doing any of the work isn't the type of leverage you want to be giving up." - Matt Bennett
"Plan baby's homecoming well before you go to the hospital. We have two dogs, and this was one of the best tips we were given. As soon as you can after birth (ie 1-2 days before you return home with the baby), bring a blanket or outfit that the baby has been wearing and just leave it somewhere where the dog(s) can smell it, so they begin to get used to the baby's smell." - Kevin Crowe
"Get baby on a schedule ASAP!!! And do your best to enforce the schedule. Mom will likely want to coddle the baby and claim "motherly instinct", but the earlier you stick to your guns, the faster baby will be taking real naps. Swaddle away, as counter-intuitive as it sounds, being wrapped up super tight without any ability to move their arms is comforting. You will probably swaddle too loose at fist and watch them wriggle out (tip, make sure your swaddle goes over the shoulders and not just around the upper arms)." - T.W.
"Do a test run on the car seat before the baby arrives. At first glance, these things may seem intuitive, but they can be a serious head scratcher for a rookie." - Matt Bennett
"A baby car seat that comes out and can just slot easily into the base is best for the journey home. A Moses basket at home works well too, or a bouncer." Rahul Kotwal
1. "Electric Swing" - Kevin Crowe
2. "Anything preppy that matches clothes I have. Ferrari walker is also a hit." - Robert Ettinger
3. "Grobags, Aden and Anais and the Miracle Blanket (swaddle). Swaddling is your friend. Get good at it early." - T.W.
4. "Don't let your wife dictate the dreaded diaper bag. 1) nobody needs the Louis Vuitton 2) you'll probably be carrying this a lot yourself in the early days 3) it's really about utility and not looks." - Matt Bennett
5. iAngel baby carrier, Mothercare baby bath tub, iBaby Monitor, Dr. Browns Baby Bottles - Rahul Kotwal
More Helpful Shopping Resources:
* Download:Ultimate Baby Checklist
1. What to Expect App - Kevin Crowe
2. Little Steps Bump Club! - A.S.
3. The New Father - A Dad's Guide To The First Year - Kevin Crowe
4. Home Game - Kevin Crowe
More Helpful Apps/Books:
"You have it easy in pregnancy, so do your best to help the one doing all the work. Anticipate her needs and help without asking. Things are the same for you but not for her - you need to relax and understand that you're now a supporting (but important) player. This too, like all else, shall pass. Also, ice cream." - Andrew Foster
"Do not argue back against irrational requests/discussions. Best to keep quiet and allow her to vent." - Robert Ettinger "Remove all sharp objects from the house. Let a lot of things slide...you're both going to be tired/frustrated/feel overwhelmed at times. Once the fog of the 'fourth trimester' clears you will be glad you did not engage. Also, post-partem depression is real and affects many more people than you think." - T.W.
"No comment, this is my advise." - Matt Bennett
"Be patient and understanding. Its easier to say than do, but there it is. At the beginning, there isn't much you can do for the baby and the bond that the mother has with the baby is much stronger than yours as the father. The key is to take care of the mother so that she doesn't get overwhelmed. Its probably going to happen anyway, but try and stay calm and just go with the flow with regards to what the wife wants to do." - Rahul Kotwal
"Worried about having our parents in town for a month. Excited about being a dad." - Robert Ettinger
"I can't wait to meet our son! Everything will change one way or another, and our family will have a new member!! I am mostly worried about worrying too much! There's so much to think about and so much we can't control, so I don't want worrying to overwhelm everything else." - Andrew Foster
"Random presents make everything better. The secret is to buy stuff you were going to have to buy eventually anyways but the element of surprise is extra thoughtful and always appreciated. Couple footrubs are a great way to spend time together." - Robert Ettinger
"Write down when baby eats/sleeps/pees/poos. It's all good ammunition for when mommy is worried that the baby isn't eating/sleeping/awake enough. Especially if you have a wife who worries easily. Change poopie diapers immediately (duh!). No need to wipe if it's only pee. It may be an old wives tale but from an observational study of two babies (both mine), the frequency of diaper rash decreased when I stopped wiping after a pee only diaper." - T.W.
"The Internet it full of useful resources, but in the end, so much of what is right will come naturally. Only consult the instructions when you run out of all other options." - Matt Bennett
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